To The Finland Station.....And Back Again.

How to Succeed in the 21st Century (Without Even Trying!)

Hey there, watch your mouth! Here is a short summary of the things one should do (or not do) to be truly successful in the 21st century. Ready? Here it goes: It's all about taking control and manning up, lawyering up, and stepping up to the plate in order to keep from getting thrown under the bus. In addition, you should also parse through the current narrative on your plate to avoid some serious major wardrobe malfunction. Try not to kick the can down the road while you're at it, and OMG if you Laugh Out Loud at the World Trade Federation which everyone seems to be talking about these days. Also, to get face time, you should be fierce, crazy sexy smart and cool, not to mention intentional, fully relational, fully engaged, and totally willing to come along side and show the love. Of course, you should also feel the love and double down on making it happen. But it will help if you also try to make a difference. Transition, position, and use grow as an active verb. If you eat your peas and take the lead, you'll rock like the rockstar you are! That would be major, big-time smoking hot. That will also be the best. thing. ever. It will also be a complete game changer. Of course, if there's a smackdown and you get dissed with your pants on the ground, then don't crash and burn even if it's gone viral, because there's an app for that, and also because it's all good. It's like that, it's all that, and if you've made 'wrong choices' and engaged in 'inappropriate behavior', then just chill and be. Because at the end of the day, you know what? IT IS WHAT IT IS. If this has inspired you, then please feel free to post this to as many people as you like. (or to as many people as you don't like)

Who's On First Principles of Effective Cross Examination?

This Summer's Coming Attractions.

The Paronomasia Review, Film Board of Ironies and Hollywood Insider have just come out with a list of the best movies due for release for the summer of 2012. Here is a quick rundown of some of the better ones:

1. "The Trayvon Martin Story"- a quickly made and released tribute to the late, great American Martyr who gave his life for his faith & country. It is expected to have its' worldwide premier in several select theatres on Chicago's southside, and more particularly, Congressman Bobby Rush's electoral district. Leni Riefenstahl, Jr. and Oliver Stone co-directed this heart-warmer. The first 100 customers will receive a free hooded sweatshirt, box of Skittles, and complementary can of RaceBait bug spray.

Interesting sidenote! At the last minute, Bob Dylan decided not to provide the soundtrack for the movie, ala 'Hurricane', and in typical Dylan style, reportedly said that he may even go back to his original birth name.

2. "The Pickish Games"- in the very near future, one boy and one girl from different towns decide to volunteer for a pleasant game of 4 hand contract bridge with Omar Sharif and Charles Goren. A love triangle and diamond compete with grand slams in this extremely mild thriller.

The theatres took a chance with the movie adaptation from the worldwide success of the popular teen book series which originally ran on page 25 next to the crossword puzzle and the Jumble of most newspapers.

3. "Not In My Neighborhood!"- the award winning documentary on racism and housing discrimination makes its' way to the big screen. This one proves to be a BLOCKBUSTER.

As a spontaneous promotional by Lancome, the first 50 ladies at each showing will receive a free case of REDLINER.

4. "This Is Your Life" and "Hell's Bells"- a double feature based on the popular evangelistic tracts of the 1970's and 80's. Instead of Ralph Edwards or Angus Young, these pictures feature Kirk Cameron starring in the lead role in both. Family Focus productions have heavily marketed the movies, mostly in truck stops and on the pavement of sidewalks. Be warned, though; these movies are definitely CHICK FLICKS.

HAW HAW HAW!

5. "I Feel the Earth Move"- a GROUNDBREAKING film chronicling the life and times of singer-songwriter Carole King. Ms. King is expected to play herself although a stand-in is on stand-by to stand out and cover her ecstatic lines and original compositions.

The old Heidegger is the new Heidegger!- F. Schaeffer

6. "A Largo in the Key of Sea"- those crazy Coen brothers team up again for a 'remake' of the famous 1948 film noir classic, "Key Largo". This one ought to be called "A Fargo in the Key of Sea" since it stars William H. Macy, Frances McDormand and Steve Buscemi and involves a man who has his wife kidnapped and then tries to get her back. You also should know that U2 will provide songs from the soundtrack: "You" and "UBet", Frances McDormand will provide the "You betcha", and Groucho Marx will provide the quiz show.

You betcha life!

7. Speaking of Key Largo, the beautiful Lauren Bacall (actually now an octogenarian)is host of a new documentary movie of her life with Humphrey Bogart and some of the other Hollywood stars. The film, "Humphrey & Lauren" is predictable but features some interesting trivia: for example, Bogie played regular golf with the urbane Jack Paar, Irish actor Birdy Sweeney and Eagle Eye Cody, who always took at least one mulligan.

Henny Youngman reportedly took his mulligans everywhere but they always found their way back home.

8. Speaking of Avatar, the original book was far, far better than the movie, and Dickens' "A Tale of Two Cities" was a far, far, better thing than either.

More? More? You ask for More? Alright then, 2 more.

9. John Grisham & Kathryn Stockett's tag-team blockbuster, "The The" is still expected to be in the theatres this summer and will reportedly run as a stand alone double feature with a 2 for 1 admission price.

If you've seen this one once, you've seen it twice!

10. Speaking of "The The", Yes did the soundtrack along with the Who and Them.

Rumors of an Abbott & Costello remake are unfounded and I don't know who or what started it.